movies this week: what’s my demographic?

I wonder when, or if, I ever was in a target audience demographic, particularly for movies.
First of all, I am female, and we all know that women are not as important as men when you are marketing a movie. After all, women will go along with their boyfriends to see a movie the boyfriend wants to see, but men won’t go along with their girlfriends to see some damn chick-headlining movie, unless it involves Uma Thurman brandishing a sword. (Hollywood people really do think like this, I am sorry to say. And they are worse about children’s movies, which is why so few children’s movies star girls. Look at the trailers for The Incredibles, in which the little boy takes center stage, and tell me I lie.)
When I was in high school, the teen market became very desirable. Studios were falling all over themselves to make movies that would appeal to teenagers (especially teenage boys, as I mentioned above). But I wasn’t allowed to see any of the teen sex comedies, so I was limited to John Hughes. I wasn’t even old enough to get into The Breakfast Club, which was rated R, because Lakeside Theaters was enforcing the under-17 rule. So I never did get any benefit from that.
I don’t remember quite when I started getting all film geeky, but I know that the teen movie fad was still going on when I was in college, only I was too old and too film snobby to want to see any of that fare.
And now I am in an age group (let’s just say “over 30″) where Hollywood and marketers assume that I don’t go to the movies at all, despite the fact that I would love to see a movie in a theater every week if I could. I am sure we average at least two movies per month in theaters, especially if you count revival and art films.
I’ve been thinking about this because this week’s crop of movies opening in Austin all seem to be designed to appeal to some particular demographic group, but those groups don’t include me. Too old and jaded for Because of Winn Dixie. Too smart for Son of the Mask. Too allergic to black trenchcoats for Constantine. (I had some nice zingers here for Man of the House, but it doesn’t open until next week. Darn.)
But wait, there is one movie that does seem to appeal to me as a film geek: Inside Deep Throat. There’s nothing like an NC-17 rated documentary to lure me to a theater. So maybe there is something for everyone in theaters right now. Isn’t that lovely? (But what demographic group does that put me in, and should I be ashamed to admit it?)

New movies in Austin this week:
Because of Winn-Dixie—A lonely little girl adopts a stray dog (Winn-Dixie—the movie is not about the grocery-store chain) and I suspect they learn about life and love and loss and all that. Directed by Wayne Wang. The supporting cast is strong, including Cicely Tyson, Eva Maria Saint, and musician Dave Matthews. Shot in Louisiana, and many of the smaller roles are played by Louisiana actors, which means we don’t have to suffer through horrible stereotypical Southern accents.
Has anyone else noticed that Jeff Daniels seems to be popping up in every family-friendly movie imaginable lately, to the point where we’ve probably forgotten he was in Dumb and Dumber? (I loved him to death in The Purple Rose of Cairo, which he’s never topped.)
Bigger than the Sky—One of my coworkers was thrilled to meet John Corbett (Northern Exposure, My Big Fat Greek Wedding), when he was in Austin promoting this movie earlier in the week. Apparently it is opening in only six cities this week and Austin is one of them. It is a movie about community theater goings-on, with tie-ins to Cyrano de Bergerac. Sounds like it might be interesting, but why cover this ground when we already have Waiting for Guffman and Robertson Davies’ fine novel Tempest-Tost?
Constantine—I have suffered through the trailers for this movie more than once and I do not think I could possibly deal with another painful minute of it. Keanu Reeves, Heaven vs. Hell, directed by a guy whose only experience is music videos, spare me. Banned in Brunei, apparently.
Inside Deep Throat—In his book Profoundly Disturbing, Joe Bob Briggs mentioned that Brian Glazer (Imagine Entertainment producer) had bought the rights to one of Linda Lovelace’s autobiographies and wanted to adapt it for the screen. I have been keeping an eye out for news on this project, which I heard would be a fiction narrative, then a documentary, and so on. I think Glazer picked the right approach: a documentary about the phenomenal history behind the movie Deep Throat. I have no desire to see Deep Throat itself (I’ve seen one scene and that was plenty), but I think this could be a fascinating documentary.
Paper Clips—Documentary about kids who decide to collect 6 million paperclips as a Holocaust memorial. This movie was featured recently in the Austin Jewish Film Festival, and it is good to see it getting a proper theatrical release.
Son of the Mask—Why, dear God, why? And if you are at all tempted, consider this: the only cast or crew member that has carried over from the delightful The Mask is Ben Stein. I don’t care Bob Hoskins and Alan Cumming are in it. Go rent the original 1994 movie again, it’s loads of fun and you get Peter Riegert.
Notable events/revivals in Austin:
Damn, y’all, there are a lot of special events and screenings in Austin this week. And this isn’t even all of it. I hope I can go to at least one.
Bloodbath and Beyond: The Extreme Cinema of Takashi Miike—Heads up on this upcoming series from Austin Film Society, on Tuesdays in March and April. Also, Alamo is enhancing the series with weekend screenings of Miike films with free admission. I feel like I ought to see at least one Miike film—feel free to suggest a good one. (And tell me how to pronounce Miike’s name.)
I must complain about one thing, though. Austin Film Society’s description of this series includes the sentence ” Although the films are rated R, no one under 17 or over 60 … will be admitted to the series.” I don’t think that’s very funny. Maybe people over 60 aren’t the ideal, um, demographic for Miike’s violent films, but to act as though they’re too feeble to make their own decisions is pretty lame, guys. Cut it out.
Brighton Rock—Playing at Alamo Downtown Thurs. 2/24 as part of the “Brit Noir” series in conjunction with the Ransom Center’s current exhibition on Graham Greene, who adapted the screenplay from his book.
Cafeteria Chaos—Playing Fri. 2/25. Another unique evening from Rolling Roadshow. This time they’re going to show 16 mm short educational films on cafeteria behavior … in a cafeteria, of course. And you can enjoy a genuine school lunch (well, dinner) prepared by cafeteria ladies while you watch the films.
Extreme Schoolbus Adventure—Playing Thurs. 2/24. Those wacky Rolling Roadshow guys. Now they’re loading up a schoolbus with an audience, a keg, and a 16 mm projector to show bus safety and disaster films. Tickets are selling out quickly.
Forbidden Animation—Playing at Alamo Downtown at midnight Thurs. 2/24 and Fri. 2/25. I don’t know if this is anything like the “Banned Toons” collection that Alamo showed in the summer of 2003 (an event I can hardly forget for sappy sentimental reasons), but that was a good line-up and well worth seeing.
Forbidden Zone—Playing at Beerland on Wed. 2/23. Probably the weirdest film I have ever seen, which might be more enjoyable if you see it in a bar, where you can have a drink or three.
Kinsey—Playing at the Paramount on Sun. 2/20. One last chance to see this movie in theaters before the Oscars.
Maria Full of Grace—Playing at the Paramount on Sun. 2/20 and Wed. 2/23. I missed this one, too, and hope to see it either here or on DVD.
The Ninth Day—Playing at the Texas Union Theatre (UT) on Wed. 2/23 at 2:40 pm, for free. Not only that, but director Volker Schlondorff will allegedly be in attendence for a Q&A after the screening. (If anyone knows any more about this screening, please email me or post a comment.)
River’s Edge—Playing at Alamo Downtown on Mon. 2/21. $1 admission. I saw this movie when it came out in 1986, but I remember very little about it. How can it be unmemorable with Crispin Glover, Keanu Reeves, and Dennis Hopper all in one film? Part of Alamo’s new 80s Night series on Mondays (next week: Footloose!).
Ramones: End of the Century—Playing at Alamo Downtown on Mon. 2/21 (for $1) and Wed. 2/23.
Spike & Mike’s Sick & Twisted Festival of Animation 2005—Playing at Alamo Village on Fri. and Sat. nights at midnight 2/18-19 and 2/25-26.
The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie—Playing at Alamo Downtown on Sat. morning 2/19. Presweetened breakfast cereal included with admission price.
A Tribute to Bill Hicks—Playing at Alamo Village on Thurs. 2/24.
What Is It?—Playing at Alamo Downtown on Sat./Sun. 2/19-20. Crispin Glover will appear at Alamo to present his new film and to sign books. The 8 pm screenings with slide show are sold out; only the 4 pm screenings are still open.