movies this week: cinespamia

So last weekend, my parents and my boyfriend and I all went to Spamarama. Spamarama is a longtime (29 years) Austin festival devoted not to unwanted email, but to the potted meat product. I hadn’t been to Spamarama before. We stayed long enough to watch the Spam relay and scarier still, the Spam toss.
The highlight of Spamarama is the big tent of people participating in the Spam cooking contest and offering samples to everyone. There was a long line of people waiting to get into the Spam sample tent. I am not quite sure what this says about Austinites. Are they brave, innovative, weird, or not very bright? We were in line with everyone else, so it’s hard for me to judge.
What I learned is that anything that tastes remotely edible with Spam in it probably tastes even better without Spam in it. (Very similar to Rachel’s insight about capers in Nora Ephron’s Heartburn.) The (relatively) tastiest dishes were so heavily spiced that any potential Spam flavor was masked: chili, jambalaya, and sauteed Spam in a mushroom wine sauce.
But I knew that deep down, it was Spam. And later on, I regretted it and had to clear my palate with some fudge pie a la mode from Scholz’s.
This week’s movies tend to make me think of Spam that has been heavily disguised with all kinds of trimmings. But at its heart … potted pork. Yum.

New movies in Austin this week:
Assisted Living—A day with the slacker janitor of a nursing home. It’s a narrative fiction film shot in a real nursing home with real residents, or something like that. Verite or meat in a can?
Fever Pitch—This is the much-hyped adaptation of Nick Hornby’s book, starring Jimmy Fallon and Drew Barrymore, and directed by the Farrelly brothers. Lovely Spam, wonderful Spam.
In My Country—Samuel L. Jackson and Juliette Binoche argue about South African politics. Directed by John Boorman. The trailers made this sound like a profound and meaningful political statement. Do you want to watch a two-hour long profound political statement? At least Michael Moore is funny sometimes.
Mail Order Wife—This sounded dumb at first … but a movie about a mail-order bride who isn’t all she appears to be could be pretty entertaining. More like devilled ham than Spam?
Okay, I’m not sure I can sustain the lame attempts at Spam-related humor any longer. I just don’t have the knack.
Nobody Knows—Japanese drama about four abandoned children. I’ve read some very positive reviews. I see no tie-ins to potted meat products.
Sahara—Directed by Breck Eisner (Michael’s kid). Stars Matthew “Enough With the Bongo Jokes” McConnaughey, Steve Zahn, and Penelope Cruz. Supporting cast includes the always-entertaining William H. Macy. Most of the reviews I have read are from slightly embarrassed critics who confess that they found this movie to be fun in a silly and brainless way. The trailers are terrible, the character names are horrible (Dirk Pitt?), but it might well be irresistable. I would compare it to spambalaya, in which the Spam may actually have enhanced the flavor in some weird and incomprehensible way, but I will resist.
Notable events/revivals in Austin:
Amityville Horror Preview Night—Playing at Alamo South on Thurs. 4/14. If you want to attend, you have to email Alamo to get on the list … and then go into a specially constructed Fly Chamber (complete with 25,000 flies) to retrieve your tickets. Sometimes I wonder if Tim League has aspirations to become William Castle.
(Now I am wondering if Alamo will ever have an Ultimate Spam Experience. Wouldn’t surprise me a bit. I would probably skip it, though.)
Film Actions V—Playing on Sat. 3/9. Luke Savisky projects film in odd and innovative ways while live music is performed in the background. A Rolling Roadshow event. Sounds absolutely fascinating. I am very tempted to go.
Goodfellas—Playing at the Paramount on Sun. 4/10 and Wed-Thurs. 4/13-14 as part of a tribute to Martin Scorsese.
Guerilla: The Taking of Patty Hearst—Playing at Alamo Downtown on Sun. 3/10. 2004 documentary was well received at Sundance.
Raging Bull—Playing at the Paramount Sun.-Tues. 4/10-12 as part of a tribute to Martin Scorsese. I’d like to see this in a theater, time permitting.
The Times of Harvey Milk—Playing at Alamo Downtown on Wed. 4/13 as part of the Texas Documentary Tour. Director Rob Epstein will attend.
Visitor Q—Playing at Alamo Downtown on Tues. 4/12 as part of the Austin Film Society series of Takashi Miike films.
At home, we are watching the commentary track of The Iron Giant. I also have The Celluloid Closet to watch, which I thought would be worth seeing because Rob Epstein will be speaking to my class next week. I finally sent back Gunga Din only half-watched; I just couldn’t get into it, sadly.
And now, a non-film-related Spam story:
I talked to my brother today and found out that my dad looked up the phone number of Hormel, the company that is responsible for Spam, and is threatening to call with a complaint. One of the tasting booths at Spamarama was “The Passion of the Pork,” complete with a very nicely done poster that spoofed the Mel Gibson movie. I was amused by the poster. I was impressed with the Spam Loaves they gave out, which didn’t taste of Spam at all. However, I think that having the loaves distributed by a guy dressed in monks’ robes who said things like “The body of Spam be with you” may have verged too close on the sacreligious. I felt a little sorry for the people responsible for the booth because it was inadvertantly ill-timed around the Pope’s final illness and I suspect some people (like my dad) were even more irritated as a result. According to my brother, the detail that upset my dad was the pig made of Spam on a crucifix.
What’s funny to me is not that my dad was apparently so outraged by this particular booth that he ranted to my brother about it for 10 minutes and has threatened to call Hormel about it. (Hormel doesn’t have anything to do with Spamarama, actually.) No, I’m amused because my dad did not say a single word to me about his disgust. I know he waited until he was alone with my mom to say anything. Not a syllable to me.
At any rate, I’m not complaining. Just amused. And wondering what Hormel would say about it if my dad did call. If I find out, I’ll let you know.